When working on our own happiness one of the biggest struggles may be the illusion of the lack of time we actually have to work with. Though, we shouldn’t fall into the habit or even the comfort of using time as an excuse; an excuse to get out of things, an excuse to not better ourselves, an excuse to not be healthy or happy.
Essentially, stop the glorification of busy.
If you’re busy it should be because you enjoy it. If you don’t enjoy how you’re using your time, you have the ability to change that. Busy is used as an excuse probably more than any right? Sorry, I can’t, I’m busy. Gosh, I would love to, but I’m busy. I really wish I could, but I’m too busy. I’m too busy to eat healthy. I’m too busy to exercise. Many greatly underestimate the power of choice when it comes to being busy. You are busy because you choose what you’re doing with your time. You might feel obligated to do something for professional or personal reasons but either way, your time, your choice.
If you’re the type of person that has a hard time saying no to things, then that is a struggle you need to work on first. So, you like to make people happy and help out, that’s great! But you can only give so much when you’re not truly happy. If you’re not enjoying how you’re spending your time then the quiality of what you’re giving is probably not your best because there’s reluctance with what you’re spending your time on or you’re completely overwhelmed.
It’s likely if you’re always being asked to volunteer for things it’s because you’ve given the impression that you want to help or people actually know you have a hard time saying no and they’re taking advantage of you. It’s not too late to change that. You have to believe that your own happiness is just as important as anyone else’s and act as if you value your happiness as well. If you don’t truly believe your happiness is important then you won’t have the strength or mindset to say no when asked to do something that doesn’t truly bring you happiness or help you meet a goal of your own.
It’s time to start shifting your thoughts you have about your time. Try replacing any negative thoughts you have regarding your time and what you spend your time doing with these phrases.
Just repeating these things with an open mind will allow you to grow confident and make changes in your life. It only seems weird at first. And if you really think about it we ‘talk’ to ourselves all. the. time. Constantly running through your head is worrisome or negative thoughts. Really you’re not doing anything new, other than turning your negative self-talk into a positive one. It’s not as out of the box as it might seem.
To open up some time in your week for yourself to pursue something different take a hard look at what you’re doing with your time. If there are commitments you’ve made or habits you’ve developed that aren’t satisfying to you it’s time to eliminate or lessen them from your life. Open up the time you need to be able to participate in things you love. Whether you want to exercise, or attend a class, have time to slow down and relax, volunteer, be crafty, or build a side business. Whatever your dreams and goals are, allow yourself the time to work toward them.
Kids? Ah, the sweet little cherub’s. Some of you might be thinking, oh but I have kids I HAVE to get them everywhere and go to everything and volunteer for this and sign up for that, and there’s not time left for me. That’s just how it is. If that’s the case then what are you teaching your children? Your life and time are of no value and you can’t be happy or further chase your dreams and goals in life? Kids are presented with so many opportunities these days, but that doesn’t mean they need to be involved in every single one; making it impossible for you to care for yourself or even have a family dinner on a weeknight anymore is a lifestyle chosen and created by parents. Take your own happiness and the wellbeing of everyone into account when signing up to participate in things. If anything, littles will learn more and become better people by hearing no, then they would being in every extracurricular from spelling bees, to band, to club sports, to history club.
Let go of some current obligations. Make it a goal of yours to opt out of something or a few things that will allow you to be less busy. When planning things for the upcoming week and month, ask yourself why you’re doing it? If it’s because you want to, or it will help get you closer to a goal of yours, set it up, otherwise don’t.
Another thought to consider is that people who enjoy what they’re doing don’t often say they’re busy to other people. They just do their thing. It’s those they’re unhappy that glorify being busy and use it as an excuse. Which are you?
